The Parent I Thought I Would Be


I was the perfect parent…until I had kids. I’m sure you’ve heard that phrase or even thought that phrase before. It is such a true statement for me. I used to be somewhat of a perfectionist, still am with a lot of things, however, throw 3 toddlers into the mixture and perfection isn’t a term that describes our daily life. Before I had kids and even in my first pregnancy with the twins, I had a perfect picture of how I’d parent my children. Sure, I knew there would be rough patches and that mom life is never easy but I would never allow certain things.

Fast forward to now. This season of life that I am in is definitely testing me in different ways than other phases have. But never in my before-kids-days could I have imagined what I will and won’t allow. I’m currently in a constant battle with my twin daughter who is 2. She is the epitome of strong willed with a splash of defiance and sweetness that makes a parent go insane. She is my “sour patch kid”…because first she’s sour, then she’s sweet. Our current battle is wearing clothes. She absolutely refuses and it is downright war trying to get clothes on this child. My pre-kid self would say “well she is the child and you are the parent so stick to it and force her to wear them”. But oh how the times have changed. That person is no longer with us because that person also didn’t know that we would have 3 toddlers at the same time. So for now, I allow her to run around how she chooses. If we need to leave the house, thats a different story but for now, this isn’t a battle I can fight. 

I think all moms have different thresholds for things their children do (or don’t do). Clearly in my pre-kid parenting mind, I had the highest threshold and the patience level of a saint! Three kids later, some days we are just getting by and doing the best we can. What can I say? Progress over perfection. I still have that little voice inside my head saying “I can’t believe you are allowing this” and “how much screen time have they had today?”, but I also know that my kids are happy, creative, well cared for little creatures and that this phase will pass. Phases always pass. 

Previous articleWhere America’s Maternity Leave System Falls Short
Next articleWhat to Expect: Prenatal Visits
Ashleigh is a mother to 3 tiny humans all within a year’s age difference! She has a set of twins (Evie Claire and Decker) and a little girl named Mary Catherine who surprised them! She and her family recently moved to St. Louis after living in Houston, TX for the past 8 years. They are so excited to continue their journey here as her husband is originally from around this area. As for Ashleigh, she’s a born and raised Mississippi girl but has loved living in big cities such as Houston and now St. Louis. When she’s not blogging or “momming”, she enjoys Pure Barre, reading a good book, traveling, farmer’s markets, and exploring new restaurants. She looks forward to getting to know the St. Louis community more!