I hope that you have some huge, bigger-than-life dreams in your heart, mama … even if they aren’t for this current season. That’s okay. I promise … the time will come for you to bring these big dreams to life. And if your current season is rough right now, daring to dream of what could be next might even help you find more joy in the ordinary of today.
I know that helped me back when I was in the thick of it all, momming so hard. My kids are all big adults now, but back in the day, all five of them had such wildly different pressing needs, and my husband was gone on business many days.
It was overwhelming most of the time, but as soon as I intentionally let myself dream again, I felt more balanced and had more purpose, showing up in my present in a way that made me feel so good (and the kids noticed, too).
However, I found that I had to keep myself in check constantly as self-doubt kept trying to creep its way in to squelch my dreams. It was so annoying, and I’m pretty sure I’m not alone in this …
It’s so tough in our crazy world not to let ourselves AND all of our doubts and fears get in the way of our dreams becoming a reality. We ALL need to be strong and ready to fulfill these big dreams that have been placed in our hearts. We need to step aside and get out of our own way! But that’s easier said than done, right? Ugh. So … here are a few things you can do right now to dream big and stop self-doubt as soon as it starts creeping in. They have helped me and many of my mama coaching clients, so I hope they help you, too!
5 WAYS TO CONQUER SELF-DOUBT:
- Let go of the need to know HOW you will create your vision of what you want.
You likely do not know how you will create your dream, especially not in the beginning. That is the way it is supposed to be, and it’s okay. We often end up doubting ourselves when we can’t see how we can create what we want. Or, sometimes we think of one way to create it and think we aren’t capable of doing that. Let go of this kind of thinking and trust that if you have a vision that excites you, you have what it takes within you to create it! … and trust that you will be given what you need to make it a reality when you need it. Start simply by recording all of your thoughts and your vision of the dream, and then see how it begins to unfold in perfect timing, step by step, as you let it happen piece by piece. You don’t need to know the HOW, you just need to begin.
- Remind yourself of how important your dream is to you.
Give yourself 5 to 10 minutes of free time to spend focusing on your vision of what you want and how you will feel when you have created your dream. Let yourself feel these positive emotions and imagine that you have already created what you want and are living your vision. Let yourself get excited because these positive emotions will energize your vision and allow it to come to you faster. This reminder of why your vision is important to you can help you set that doubt aside and propel you forward faster!
- Be a witness to the voice of self-doubt.
As you notice the voice of doubt coming up, watch the thoughts that come up rather than participating with them. Recognize that it is the voice of the part of you that wants to keep you the same and to keep you in familiar territory. Distancing yourself from this voice can help you to gain perspective so you are still in charge and your doubting-self is not. Release the need to fight it; simply allow the doubt to be expressed and move on.
- Get the doubts and fears down on paper and out of your mind.
In your mind, your doubts and fears tend to endlessly repeat themselves and keep you stuck. Get out a piece of paper and write out all of the doubts and fears that come to mind. On a new piece of paper, write down positive statements around why you CAN create your vision. Maybe you are downplaying your strengths and abilities; list these on this second piece of paper as well. When you are done, read over the doubts one last time, then tear the paper into tiny pieces and throw it away. Read over your positive statements and let the positive emotions and a feeling of confidence take over. Feel free to read these positive statements whenever you need to remind yourself that you are capable!
- Repeat a personalized affirmation to yourself.
This will instill positive beliefs around your ability to create your vision. Make sure the affirmation feels good when you say it, and that it is meaningful to you. The better you feel when you repeat it, the faster it can become your reality.
I believe in myself.
I deserve to have what I want.
I am safe, etc. …
Whatever resonates with you. You can also use the positive statements you created in #4 above.
Self-doubt is likely something that you will face on the path to your dream, but that is no reason to stop moving forward. Take a few minutes to readjust your focus using the tips above, and you will be feeling better and more confident, ready to move forward to your dreams once again!
What is my bigger-than-life-sized dream?
Back then, it was to be doing what I do now … to be a life + business coach full time, helping women live their best lives. Now that I’m here, my next one is to plan my bigger-than-life retirement with my honey, and it’s so fun weaving our hearts’ desires together for our future.
So … what is YOUR bigger-than-life-sized dream? I’d love to hear all about it in a comment below …